Trump Picks ED Frequent Flier for Surgeon General

Citing his “health care experience,” Mr. Horace Beckwith, a chronic back pain patient and so called “drug seeker” with no previous administrative experience, has been chosen as the new surgeon general by the incoming Trump administration.

Mr. Beckwith, 45, has been designated a “frequent flier” by the new American College of Emergency Physicians FFED criteria, suggesting at least 3 ED visits per week for at least a year. In fact, Mr Beckwith almost doubled that in the past year, with over 300 visits to at least 10 different EDs in the Atlanta, GA metropolitan area.

“Mr. Beckwith brings a wealth of experience from being on the front lines of health care day in and day out,” said transition team chairperson, Mr. Mike Pence, citing his daily visits, “No one, not even the doctors, has had more ‘health care exposure’ than Mr. Beckwith. We are confident that he will translate that experience into health care action as we surround ourselves with the best people for Making America Great Again”

Mr. Beckwith could not be reached for comment as he was current researching his new role by checking into triage at Grady Hospital. Sources say, he was demanding IV Dilaudid and a prescription for “extra strength Percs” from his ED doctor for his chronic hip pain.

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